I remember at the beginning of Year seven, I made a vow to myself that I would never try to lose weight. That I would never be one of those girls who starved themselves and never ate.
The first time I read the book, ‘Skinny’, was actually about a year ago. My memory isn’t too good but I rememered the feeling of the book quite well. I remember scoffing at the character Giselle and at her hopeless attempts. As I read on, however, I discovered all her insecurities, how lost she was and I was swept away with her. There was a deep meaning behind all the sentences, the feelings of the characters were thrown at me, so tangled that I couldn’t separate them. There was a feeling of desperation throughout the book, so real, it felt like it would suck you in. ‘Skinny’ made me afraid.
One year later, 7kg heavier, I have thought about losing weight a couple of times. Just earlier today, at a family gathering, relatives have remarked on how my arms were fatter and when I told them my weight, they gasped and exclaimed, ‘My, how heavy you’ve grown!’ These comments would be enough to lower any girl’s self-esteem. An average girl would wonder at least once in their lives if they should lose weight. And as I’m sitting before the computer now, eating yoghurt instead of chips, I’m wondering the same thing.
However, I think again. I am the average weight. I am not fat. I should not be ashamed. People who truly love me would not judge me for how much I weigh. ‘Skinny’ is also about true love, loyalty and trust. People were there to help Giselle when she fell. So, when another family gathering comes around, I will hold my head up high and not let anything get to me. I am not fat. I am your average teenager. I will eat and I will live.